Staring out my window, looking at the people walking around on the streets, with their couple & kids..... how beautiful that moment could be when you get to see the happiness in their eyes....
Wishing i could be one of them in the crowd, having joy in such sunny day....somehow, only to find myself sitting at my room and thinking something which i thought i should not have been giving a thought about it at all...
i should not have fallen into the trap you said earlier, i thought it's not gonna happen... somehow, it seems to crystallize gradually... i wish it did not happen... never...
What the hell with me? why just couldn't i let go? why couldn't i just pretend i feel nothing? it hurts a lot when i have to pretend i don't mind at all & to support your view. Sometimes i wish i could beg you not to mention about the person, or even non-stop praising that person in front of me, coz it frustrated me so much and most of all, silently enough, my heart aches deeply. i knew you would not have any idea how i feel right now.... i thought i will never tell you about this at all, not now, not in the future, forever...
This was when recently i felt there was a gap between us, you might don't know about that, but i do. i don't feel like talking so much to you, as i was afraid i will accidentally hear you saying about that person again, my heart will ache again.... i feel myself keep stay away from you, coz i was a.f.r.a.i.d & that feeling was indeed desperate! & it damn SUCKS!
i wish i could give myself some time to wash all this stupid & crazy thoughts away for a moment, i don't wish i get unhappy because of this stupid thing. Maybe i think too much, but it just sometimes inevitable where i happen to become the victim in this game. I will try hard to let go & keep holding on ~ i believe i can make it!
Wishing i could be one of them in the crowd, having joy in such sunny day....somehow, only to find myself sitting at my room and thinking something which i thought i should not have been giving a thought about it at all...
i should not have fallen into the trap you said earlier, i thought it's not gonna happen... somehow, it seems to crystallize gradually... i wish it did not happen... never...
What the hell with me? why just couldn't i let go? why couldn't i just pretend i feel nothing? it hurts a lot when i have to pretend i don't mind at all & to support your view. Sometimes i wish i could beg you not to mention about the person, or even non-stop praising that person in front of me, coz it frustrated me so much and most of all, silently enough, my heart aches deeply. i knew you would not have any idea how i feel right now.... i thought i will never tell you about this at all, not now, not in the future, forever...
This was when recently i felt there was a gap between us, you might don't know about that, but i do. i don't feel like talking so much to you, as i was afraid i will accidentally hear you saying about that person again, my heart will ache again.... i feel myself keep stay away from you, coz i was a.f.r.a.i.d & that feeling was indeed desperate! & it damn SUCKS!
i wish i could give myself some time to wash all this stupid & crazy thoughts away for a moment, i don't wish i get unhappy because of this stupid thing. Maybe i think too much, but it just sometimes inevitable where i happen to become the victim in this game. I will try hard to let go & keep holding on ~ i believe i can make it!
